25th Sept - Cusco Day 1

Woke up after my deep slumber and got ready to have a walk around Cusco. Where’s my jacket? Oh balls, I must have left it in the bar last night. A fleece. In a backpacker's bar. I’ll never see that again. Asked in the bar on the off chance, ah there it is. Got it back. So I’ve now lost my shoes, my phone and my fleece and got them all back. I lost 4 jackets in my year in Oz and never got any of them back. South America is great!

Decided to give a wander around the town and see what was to be seen. The central plaza - called Plaza de Armas like most of them in Peru - was all right only. The one in Arequipa was a lot nicer.

Went to tourist information and they were a bit surprised by my request:
John: “How’re ya love, listen I don’t want to see any churches or museums, what’ve you got here in Cusco?”

Tourist info girl: “Ah, there’s nothing else”

John: “Oh right… aaah, ok I suppose. Ah, I know the local Cusco team play in the top division of the Peru soccer league, can you tell me when they’re playing this wkend?”

Tourist info girl: “If you buy a paper, you can check in there”

John: “But you’re tourist information, you stupid b***h! How the fukk am I supposed to know! Like are you paid to be here or are you just volunteering and can't be arsed to actually help! FFS, this is a jokeshop!”

Note: this last sentence of mine came out as “ah grand, no problem, I’ll go and buy a paper so”, but what’s above is definitely what I wanted to say!

She did tell me about some archaeological ruins near the city which were only about a 30 min uphill walk but as I was still acclimatising to the altitude, I caught a taxi up there. Taxi driver was a gas man, we’d good soccer chat all the way. Got to the ruins, and the entrance fee was S40 - about €12! The ape in tourist misinformation had obviously left this out. So I marched back down the hill into town with 2 Uruguayans who were in exactly the same boat as me!

Then landed back in the main square and started to chat to a couple of local police. Gas men the two of them. Edgar and Elvis, I was chatting to them for about 45 mins and among other things they were telling me that they earn 12,000 Sols per yr which is around €3,000. I know the standard of living is lower over here but that's still a terrible wage. No wonder there are corrupt cops in South America!

Elvis, Me, Edgar - a great bunch of lads!

Anyway, Elvis gave me his phone number and said he was on for pints if I was on for it later as he had a pass from the bird for the night! I intended spending the night in the hostel, so reckoned it was unlikely I’d call him, but I said I would obviously. I'm such a tease!

Anyway I went for a bite to eat in Jack's a place the reviewer in Lonely Planet described as "the only place in the world I'll queue for food" - and in fairness it was actually that good!

Spent ages then wandering around looking for places to watch a replay of the Aussie rules grand final. Aussie lads I'd met, Rich, Matt and Rob were all big into it and I'm into sport and having a few pints so was a good mix! All came to nothing in the end though.

Back to the hostel anyway and decided, right it's time to blog. With photos. I tried, sweet Lord I tried for an hour but got nowhere. I f-ing hate technology! Rattled i landed back into the room and the English and Canadian lad were launching into a bottle of rum. They gave me some to calm me down and then we all went to the hostel's sat night party.

The theme was... cross-dressing. Like... who in their right mind could think that this nonsense was a good idea? Seriously. Ridiculous nonsense.

It's a sad state of affairs when a Swiss guy in a bra looks better than you do!

Tipped on to the nightclub when Loki closed. Club was utterly packed and well, something just didn't feel right. Was chatting to a lad when he said "Tengo catorce", then the penny dropped. As I looked around, I noticed he wasn't the only one. He had said: "I'm fourteen". I would say that taking out backpackers, 90% of the club was under sixteen. I felt sick. Immediately left and took a delegation with me to the next place. That was all right, ended up going to McDonalds with a couple of Aussie doctors. That's more like it! A good night out.